Life can be a little too hectic and demanding at times, so it’s important to establish a few coping techniques. 

Today I have three top tips – motivational messages, pamper time, and how to ease an aching back for those who spend hours on the computer!

MOTIVATIONAL MESSAGES:

As an author I’m used to deadlines, but recently I had three lots of edits/proof reads from two different publishers all arrive within a couple of days of each other. Normally that’s not a problem – if they arrive one at a time. There’s no schedule for their arrival and normally the deadline is two to three weeks. That gives plenty of time to cope with the little problems life throws up on a regular basis and the usual ankle-biters – that unexpected blip on the computer, family demands, invitations you can’t refuse and (as it’s summer) hay fever.

It was time to focus and prioritise. After a few extremely long days, interspersed with babysitting duties (which are, of course, top priority), two of the three tasks were ticked off my list. Then back to the biggest task – a full structural edit.

So how do I keep it all together when, even in my ‘super-organised life‘, things I cannot control hit me head-on as if I’m being tested? Well, a few months ago I discovered The Universe Has Your Back! It’s a 52-card deck of cards from Gabrielle Bernstein, the gorgeous artwork is by Micaela Ezra.

Each morning I shuffle the cards until one falls out and I keep that card on my desk as a motivational tool. On the day that the third lot of edits arrived, two cards fell out and suddenly my spirits lifted. It reminded me to stop stressing and get on with it! I realised that: A. I’m fortunate enough to do something I love and I should never forget that, and B. once these three deadlines are out the way I can get back to my work in progress. Which is a Christmas book and I love being in Christmas mode!

I’d slipped into ‘woe is me’ mode, when the work really is fun AND although it was an obstacle, I was going in the right direction! The natural reaction to suddenly being swamped (when you are a planner) is to panic. Panicking wastes time and energy, and it’s a negative emotion. I also read tarot and oracle cards, which I find a great de-stressing tool, but I’ll come back to that in a future blog post.

 

This beautiful deck of cards costs around £10.00 on Amazon:
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Universe-Has-Your-Back-52-card/dp/178180933X/

 

and I can honestly say they are a little boost to kick-start my day. What I also find rather surreal, is how often the message really links in with whatever is going on with me.  There is a lot of negativity in this world and sometimes it can hit you when you are least able to fend it off. You might be feeling unwell, struggling with a problem you can’t easily resolve, or have had your armour dented. Enough to have chipped away at your confidence. Here’s one card that really made me stop and think, on a day I was feeling quite emotional:

I recognise that I have chosen fear, and I choose again.
I CHOOSE LOVE.

Enough said. If you are looking for a little bit of happiness in a box, these might just be for you.

 

PAMPER TIME!

A spa day is a very rare treat for me. I’m probably working harder than I’ve ever worked in my life before and I’m happy (and grateful) to be doing that, BUT I’m always aware of stress. Just spending hours in front of a computer screen, or even sitting in the garden writing on my iPad, it’s all pure concentration. So how do I unwind?

My weekly (sometimes twice-weekly if I need it) pamper kit doesn’t cost a lot.  I nip into our local HOME BARGAINS store and for less than £5 I’m sorted. The Dead Sea Collection bath salts (£1.99) are amazing and my favourite is the lavender oil salts, although I do like the coconut oil variety, too. Containing magnesium (for good metabolism), potassium (for good energy flow), bromide (a natural antiseptic and skin smoother), chloride (for good cell mineral balance) and sodium (which balances water levels) a 30-minute soak revitalises and relaxes me. One tub this size (34.2 oz) is enough for 5 sessions.

While I’m soaking I love the Derma V10 woven masks. Usually they are on sale at just under £1 each. Soaked in collagen, you lay the mask over your face while you relax in the bath. It’s cooling on the skin and leaves it feeling very soft. 

I’m also an avid fan of exfoliating – and I will be posting more about this in a future post on home facials. The gloves, which cost £1 a pair, last for months. I use Cusson’s Imperial Leather gentle care soap for sensitive skin and find that it lathers well on the gloves, leaving my skin with a little glow.

A home spa treatment that doesn’t cost a fortune – but always test
a product on your skin before you use it for the first time.
Just in case you have an allergy, or it’s too strong for you.

OH, THAT ACHING BACK…

Even though I take regular breaks, I work long hours on the computer. I use an old, wooden, science lab stool which aligns my spine without any conscious effort and is very comfortable. But I’ve found, increasingly, that I’ve been rounding my shoulders, almost hunching them without noticing what I was doing. 

 

I purchased this Gritin posture corrector for £9.99 and the different it has made is incredible. I wear it whenever I’m typing. Well, to be honest, I wear it all the time when I’m at home. And when I’m exercising (more to come on that topic very soon). 

Not only has it stopped the ache I was getting, but muscles – it seems – have a memory. My posture has never been the best, but I do stand straighter now and feel much better for it. I certainly no longer roll my shoulders forward while I’m typing and that, too, encourages me to maintain the natural curve of my spine. The one I purchased is out of stock at the moment but a quick look on Amazon and I found a similar product:

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B07GXSNVMD/

But there are lots of styles to choose from to suit every price range.

 

I think that today’s post pretty well sums up what’s going on in my life at the moment. Some very intense periods of work which I’m trying my best to balance out by making sure I feel good. Both mentally and physically.

When I’m on the other side of this frenetic period, I will be able to take some quality down-time. But my focus is firmly on not comfort eating, or over-indulging in anything that will end up leaving me feeling jaded. I still fit in my exercise regime every other day and adhere to the healthy eating programme I began almost a year ago. 

What has to give? Well, social media isn’t just a part of my work, it’s a part of my life. It’s how I stay in touch with people I don’t see very often. However, I’m only human and there are only so many hours in a day. So to friends awaiting messages from me – “waves” and so glad you popped in to see what I’m up to! I will be back, I promise. I just have a Christmas book to finish and then I’m taking a break… maybe…

 

Please note – all opinions are my own. Any products/links I share are because I have purchased, or used the product, and I have no affiliation with the product/person/organisation. As they say – sharing is caring and if you find something you like, then job done! Until next time…

 

 

Have you ever wondered why so many of the old wives’ tales and sayings contain more than simply a grain of truth? Well, often it’s all about common sense, but there’s nothing at all common about sense. It took a lot of life experience for these little gems of wisdom to be seemingly conjured up out of thin air.

A stitch in time saves nine – sounds bizarre, doesn’t it? But years ago when you couldn’t simply pop to the shop and buy a new jumper (due to cost and/or availability), someone had to sit down with needles and wool to knit it. And what happened if it developed a hole? Well, you stitched it, because if you didn’t the hole would get bigger and before you knew it, it wouldn’t be wearable.

Like it, or not, life experience teaches us lessons that we need to learn. But that means being aware and taking note. Or going around in circles constantly making the same mistakes.

Which leads me to the question ‘Is it time to get your ducks in a row?‘

Spring and summer is a time of renewal and Mother Nature knows her stuff! She does it every single year. Time to let the old leaves etc break down and go back into the earth and replace it with fresh, new shoots. And then comes the explosion of colour and vibrancy, which along with some sunshine is like a shot of adrenaline. Mother nature does an annual de-clutter and so should we!

Doing an annual clean to spruce up the house is both cathartic and re-energising. But more than that it also raises the spirits. Your surroundings matter. If you live in a disorganised, dusty/dirty environment your surroundings can begin to feel oppressive. If you live in an orderly, clean environment… you get the message. Home should be a relaxing place, your haven from the world.

Working from home, with tight deadlines, I can honestly say that I work best when I feel that all aspects of my life are reasonably under control. My first priority is family/friends, then work, but in order to keep everything ticking over I’ve had to share the ‘home’ workload (which was tough for me). Together, my partner and I whip things into shape in the least time possible by keeping on top of everything.

Top tips for that once-a-year kick-start to achieve the feelgood factor:

Start at the top of the house and work down.

Buy a long-handled duster mop and work from the top of the walls down to the floor.

Clean the light fittings.

I use Flash lemon cleaner to wet wipe every surface, furniture, skirting boards and doors. Don’t forget the light switches.

Vacuum every inch of the floor/wet wash if a solid floor.

Vacuum the mattresses. Check your duvets, pillows and pillow shams – do they need washing, or replacing?

Go through your wardrobe and recycle anything you no longer use. Wipe out the inside of cupboards to freshen them up.

Get the kids involved – time to clear out the old toys they have outgrown. Kids learn by example and it’s a great way to let them see that houses don’t tidy, or clean, themselves!

Curtains and rugs – take them outside and give them a good shake. Dust curtain poles etc. Pull out all of the furniture for that once-a-year deep clean.

In the kitchen – blitz the fridge, freezer and cooker. Make it sparkle and then keep on top of it by wiping things over at least once a month. Then move on to the bathrooms – discard any products you no longer use as you clean out cupboards etc.

Then stand back – savour that fresh, clean smell and remind yourself that the way to stop something being a big CHORE is to keep on top of it. Why not plan to have a once-a-month targeted clean? Cleaning an oven or fridge after only a month’s use is infinitely easier than cleaning it every six months etc.

The annual clean can also involve touching up damaged woodwork, or giving a room a quick lick of paint to freshen it up. I’ll have more tips on how to save time and money when it comes to house maintenance in a later post. But if time is a precious commodity in your life, being organised can save you A LOT OF TIME – believe me, that was one of my biggest life lessons!

Of course, it’s not just old wives’ tales that endorse the benefits of the BIG clean. Have you heard of Feng Shui? It endorses some of nature’s most basic principles. This is a lady I’ve followed for a while:

The amazing Kathryn Weber
https://redlotusletter.com/

I’m constantly searching for ways to enhance and make my life better. It’s all about generating that feelgood factor. I’ve been more than happy to adopt some of the Feng Shui principles that have resonated with me. I was delighted to discover that there were quite a few I’d been embracing quite naturally for many years. Why not click and have a read – you might find something of benefit to you.

OK – we’re done with cleaning, how about raising a smile? I like to have things around me that instantly raise a smile. From the kitsch, to the statement piece – and often it’s not expensive, just fun. Here is a modern version of a cuckoo clock (from Dunelm) hung on a stencilled tree in the kitchen. It make the corners of my mouth go up every time I walk past it and the kids absolutely LOVE it!

My best, fun purchase this month was £8 from Primark. I’m a cat lover – what can I say? If you love the Pusheen emoji’s what’s more fun than jumping into bed wearing this?

Managing one’s time – life/work/family – is the key to feeling less stressed and happier. Decluttering, getting organised and making the mundane easier = a good investment.

Pop back next month to see what bargains I’ve managed to stumble across and more tips on how to organise your life/home/family whilst staying reasonably sane…

Remember: some things in life are down to the choices we make, so make them good ones!

Please note – all opinions are my own. Any products/links I share are because I have purchased, or used the product, and I have no affiliation with the product/person/organisation. As they say – sharing is caring and if you find something you like then job done! Until next time…

Future posts include:

The fight to keep fit; ergonomics when you spend hours at your PC; keeping calm when the pressure is on; life hacks and much more!

It’s been a while since I had the time to blog, but I’m sure many people would agree that sharing can be a very cathartic process. So, here is the first post in a series I’m calling: The Happiness Factor. I will be sharing my top tips on everything – from the world of writing, to interior design ideas and anything in between, which I think might help someone else on their own life journey! In particular, the things that help to keep me sane, despite the madness swirling around me.

Grabbing life and running with it has always been my motto. But that’s easy to say and the reality is that life is never easy for any of us!

It’s taken me three years to re-balance my life and I did this by telling myself I needed to work SMARTER and not HARDER. In truth, I couldn’t possibly have worked any harder. But everything I was doing at that time meant something to me, so there were some very tough choices to be made.

After running the online e-magazine Loveahappyending.com, it was very sad to say goodbye to it because the editors, contributors and readers had become a big part of my life. But I was also a writer, a wife, a mother, a grandmother, a friend, and a colleague. 

What I learnt was that if you spread yourself too thinly then this is what happens:

a) you end up frazzled

b) when something insignificant goes wrong it can often feel like the final straw

c) you start to feel guilty if you can’t be everything to everyone and instantly available

d) opportunities that come your way begin to pose a real dilemma as you know that grabbing them could leave you feeling conflicted

So what is the answer to maintaining one’s sanity?

Well, you sit and meditate. What are your hopes and dreams? What will it take for YOU to remain happy and motivated, so you can continue to fulfil all those other roles you have in your life?

I learnt that letting go is hard.

I learnt that I deserved to think about what I wanted and not just think about other people, because it gave my life balance.

Balance made me happier and saying ‘no’ is sometimes the only way to maintain one’s sanity.

Three years on and I’m now the author of an Amazon UK top 5 novel ‘Snowflakes over Holly Cove’. And in that time I’ve had another six novels published by two different publishers. Thanks to my lovely readers, they have all had best-seller flags around the world and as an author that is what keeps me writing. It’s the thought that people are escaping into my stories that validates the work I do and that’s reader power, folks!

But even when you do something you love, and you work hard to keep that life/work balance in check as best you can, stress is never far away. I’ve just been through one of the most exciting, stressful, exhilarating and testing months of my life. Everything from major work decisions, to celebrating the 10th anniversary of the loss of my lovely mum.

And what I discovered was that three years on from my major working smarter – not harder initiative, it was time for another overhaul!

This time I had to go back to basics and that was to get back in touch with the inner me. With a massively busy work desk and meetings requiring travel, family commitments and a cold that felt more like the ‘flu, I will admit it knocked me sideways.

I allowed myself some guilt-free down time. Now, as a person who thrives on being productive, achieving something – whether it’s painting a wall, cleaning the house, or writing a book – that’s not easy for me to do. Five minutes sitting in the garden and I’m bored, so I’m up and weeding. But my gut instincts were telling me I needed to rest, relax and think.

I used the time to catch up on one of my favourite past times – discovering what the planetary alignments were doing to make this particular Gemini’s life so crazy! I follow the awesome Susan Miller:

https://www.astrologyzone.com/horoscopes/

And I also spent time on YouTube watching tarot readings by the inspirational Nicholas Ashbaugh and Adalina Bonn:

https://www.youtube.com/user/NicholasTarot/videos 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCf1jlrBcrRy0UI1H7L273RQ

The result was that I shook that flu-like cold much more quickly than a lot of people I knew who also had it. I came to terms with some very difficult decisions (more news on that to come) and I recharged my batteries. It also helped to explain why life was speeding up, and for those who believe in this sort of thing, that is an ENORMOUS help. It wasn’t just me, honestly – many Geminis would have felt the effects!

Am I super excited about my next steps? Absolutely!

Did I fight off the stress demons? Yes!

Now, you might not be into astrology or tarot. Your go-to relaxation/support mechanisms/head-clearing aids might be listening to music, or watching films. Or nights out with friends…

Whatever works for you, it’s important to realise WHEN you need to take that time out and WHAT works best. Try to avoid things you might end up regretting – a shopping spree, or comfort eating (a little is fine in my book!) for example. And feel confident that the people around you will understand if you suddenly need to spirit yourself away to a quiet place for a short while. Those who don’t, don’t really know or care for you.

I’m back working on edits for my next Christmas novel and feeling re-energised. And grateful to Susan, Nicholas and Adalina for their part in lifting my spirits and reminding me to listen to what my gut instincts were trying to tell me.

I thought it would also be fun to talk about my ‘best buys‘ – I do love a bargain and this handbag/backpack from makers Bessie was only £25 from TK Maxx! If you haven’t discovered this range of bags here is their website:  https://www.bessielondon.com/

Good quality bags at affordable prices and some beautiful designs!

In future posts I will share products I’ve purchased which for one reason or another, I’ve found a boon. In particular, a back-brace I use when I’m spending long hours at the keyboard; and products I use to create a relaxing environment in my study.

I knew in early 2019 that it was going to be an exciting year, but that means lots of hard work and making sure I keep myself in good shape physically and mentally. So, of course, I’ll also be sharing my top tips on that, too!

Wishing everyone a happy April – thanks so much for dropping by and do pop back to check out
the next Happiness Factor blog, which will include:

My favourite Feng Shui practices;
why the annual clean/de-clutter is a good idea (yes, really!)
and why walking into your favourite room
should always make you smile!

 

Please note – all opinions are my own. Any products/links I share are because I have purchased, or used the product, and I have no affiliation with the product/person/organisation. As they say – sharing is caring and if you find something you like then job done! Until next time…